Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Trying to Stay Afloat

Hey Bloggers, so things have been sort of crazy for me lately and it's caused me to be quite stressed out. I had a paper due today that I pushed to the last minute but got it done! I hope I did well, but who knows, the teacher for that class grades pretty harshly. But i've done all I can do so I'll just have to see what happends.

Also, I had a terrible weekend of eating everything in sight and gained about like 4 pounds. I know it's not real weight so i'm not freaking out that much, but I am disappointed with the fact that I let myself eat like that. I'm still going to remain positive though, and pick myself up!

I never heard back from the people I sent my headshots too, time to move on to more auditions. I e-mailed Radiant 3 productions and I should be gong to a shoot on friday. I know it's not cool of me, but i'm not exactly thrilled to be going up there. I just have a bad taste in my mouth about the last visit I had where I did nothing but paperwork. They are shooting now, so maybe this time will be better. I just want to go on set and not be in the office stapling documents and filing.

Thanks for reading,


Friday, October 22, 2010

Working it out

Hey bloggers! In my last blog I talked about my issues with my boyfreind. Unfortunately, I didn't get to talk to him about it but I defintely will today. I think the best thing might be that we break up because I have just been settling way to long. But I still want to discuss it with him and see what he thinks. My heart hurts at the thought of not being with him, but if it's the best for me as a person then I have to do it. I owe to to myself.

I weighed today and I was 164.8, I was up .2 from Wednesday, but i'm not said about that at all. That means by next week i'll be less than I was this week. I'm making progress. I'm happy about that.

I haven't heard from Radiant 3 Productions since my visit last week, I would have went today but I had to take my car in because the check engine light is on, we all know that means i'll be with  no car all day.

I applied to audtion for these short films but haven't heard back from them. I'm tired of waiting on the "Jason Banks" film to continue shooting. I haven't heard from the director/producer in awhile. It's kinda sad though, it would have been nice to add that to my acting resume. Oh well, I must move on.

Thanks for reading,

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Reevaluating my life

Okay, so alot of things have been going on with me lately and I have made a decision that I need to do some reevaluating. I know I am not perfect, but I always strive to be the best person I can be and so I every now and then, I evaluate where my life is going to make sure I am staying on track. I am very goal oriented, and I believe this is part of the reason I do these evaluations. I want to make sure I am remembering my wants and needs. I want to be the happiest I can be, and sometimes when we go through life we lose sight of what we want. So I evaluate.

Alright, I know I dont talk much about my relationship with my boyfriend. But this is what has been bothering me the most.  I would like to start out by making a shout out to Teen Bride, she has been coming to my blog for a few days now. I just want to thank her because I made this decision to reevaluate my relationship after reading her blog and talking to her via comments. So thanks agian! Check out her blog at Teen Bride. She is awesome!

Okay, so my boyfreind and I have a good realtionship but there are things about him that make me wonder. In the interest of time, I will just say that his temper and negativity towards life are the main issues. Before I got with my boyfreind, my goal was to have a guy that was very compatible to me, doesn't drink or smoke, takes care of himself and wants to have the best life he can possibly have. My bf is going through a rut right now after losing his makes him depressed and so he's very negative. He doesn't take care of his body..he stopped working out and he drinks and smokes.

I have tried to ignore his negativity, but I am finding that as time goes on his attitude is getting worse and not better. In turn, that is making me feel sad and not happy because he brings down my mood. I know that I am worth a guy that will try to get his life together. My boyfriend is so lost in his depression that he has stopped trying. In January of 2011 I will have been with him for 3 years...he has been going through this depression for about 1 year and a half.

So to keep this as short a possible. Today I am going to face my boyfreind and tell him that I can't stay with him if he can't get himself together. Its been a long time and I have tried to be his rock and foundation. But enough is enough. I'm not sure where our relationship is headed, but I have to make sure i'm happy always.

Thanks for reading,


Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Feeling Better

Hey Bloggers! Hope you like my new layout, i'm feeling great today so I felt like making a change :)

So yesterday I went to an actual shoot with Wonderroot TV. They produce one episode per month for a local station and they also post them online. It consists of different segments but basically their goal is to connect the community to local artists. When I say artists, I mean ANY type...sculpters, painters, musicans, photographers... anything you can think of. Their office has a recording studio, a photography room (not sure of the technical name), a painter and scuplting room, and even a garage where muscians can perform. The place is awesome! When they complete this show that I helped out with i'll be sure to post it!

There are alot of students there too, so i'm around my peers. I think i'm going to find a way to get $10 a month so I can be a member and then I can go to the various workshops they have. I really want to get ahead of the game and learn final cut pro! I also want to learn photoshop.

I weighed yesterday and I was up..but only .2 so i'm super happy about that. To me, that means by friday I should be down from where I was last week! More progress, i'm ready for it! I've also become addicted to biggest loser and Thintervention which comes on Bravo. I've decided to kick up my workouts even more. Today, i'm going to run 3 miles! I usually just do an hour of cardio, but I think today i'm gonna step it up. I want this weight gone! 

I hope all of you are doing wonderful! Thank you so much to the 9 followers out there, you guys are amazing!

Thanks for reading,


Sunday, October 17, 2010

Disappointed I went to my "shoot" with Radiant 3 Productions on Friday..and I must say I was disappointed on so many levels. First, the independent film we are working on is still in pre-production. They don't start shooting until Tuesday. So therefore I didn't go to any shoot. My "title" is PA (production assistant) and I found out exactly what that means....

I got to their office at 10:00am and didn't leave until 8:30pm...Keep that in mind. All I did was file paperwork...make phone calls...print documents...staple, paperclip, and hole bunch said documents... answer phone calls..and send emails. It was the most boring day EVER!!! I was ready to leave by 3:00pm...I was tortured until 8:30pm. I know that I dont have much experience..and I was told I wouldn't be doing much when I started out but really?!?! Sending e-mails? For 10 hours?!?! I tried to high-tail it out of there at 3...but when I asked to leave the women said, "You do know these are 12 hour days right?"

12 hours?!?! I must be perfectly honest with you guys...I am not looking forward to paperwork for 12 hours at a time. I want to be on set! But...I'm not too good to work my way up from the bottom, and PA work is something almost everyone has to go through to get where they are trying to go in this industry. I'm willing to do the best I can so I can try and learn more and move up.

I did get stopped by the guy I interviewed with orginally and he asked me how things were going. We had a pow wow and it made me feel alot better. He said once shooting starts i'll be able to go on set and help out there. Even though of course it won't be real work, it will still probably be grunt work, I'd rather be on set doing it then in an office. Also some other things happened in our pow wow.

When I was talking to him he stopped me mid sentence and said, "Do you sing?" I smiled and yes, "Yea how did you know that?' he said, "I can tell by your speaking voice, I knew it. I want to hear you sing." So I sang for him and he said I sound really great and he asked me about what I was doing with it. He also asked me about my acting. I'm glad that he knows about my aspirations to be in front of the camera as well :) maybe I can make something happen out of it.

Also, I weighed on friday and I was 165.8!! That made me really happy because I have been jumping around from 166 to 167 and such. I'm glad to be making real progress! I'm worried about my weigh in tomorrow though, this weekend my eating has been so so, not that great not that bad. We'll see but I have a feeling i'll be up a little. Sorry this was so long I had lots to tell you!

Thanks for reading,


Thursday, October 14, 2010

Can't give up

Hey Bloggers! So first things first, I got the exam I was worried about back from my teacher. The class average was a 70, which is a C and not that great. So our teacher decided to curve the grade and gave us all 7 points. But I didn't even need the extra points :) I got a 92 without the curve, a 99 with it. So i'm very proud of myself. The exam was hard and most people didn't do well.

I also weighed on Wendesday and I was down to 166.8 so i'm happy about that. I'm still not sure what caused my temporary gain on Monday, so i'm hoping I can make real progress within these next few weeks. My birthday is coming up soon, and I would like to be a little smaller for that. :)

Tomorrow is my shoot with Radiant 3 Productions, so i'm excited about that. I'm ready for anything they throw at me, for some reason I think they might try to throw things at me since I am new. I'm ready to do well. I also have a shoot with Wonderoot TV on Monday so that's good.

I'm going to start submitting my headshots to auditions now, i've waiting long enough for this film "Jason Banks" to get done and I can't wait any longer. I feel like I have delayed too long, but when we start filming again I will have to juggle it somehow. I'll make it work. Hope all is well with you guys!

Thanks for reading,


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Pushing forward

Hey bloggers, I hope all is well. I weighed myself on Monday and that didn't go so well, I was up significantly to 168.4. Not quite sure what happened, but I do have some specualtion that it may have something to do with that lovely time of the month coming up. We'll see.

But onto better news, I finally heard back from Wonderroot TV and I will be going to a shoot with them on next Monday. I'm glad everything is going well with that. Now I see that I didn't have to worry about the production side of things.

The film that i'm acting in "Jason Banks"...isn't as promising. I just texted the director, and he just said that he's getting the schedule set up for 3 weeks from now in an effort to try and stop the cast from cancelling. It's a little discouraging to me because I haven't really been sending my acting resume or headshots to other auditions because of the interest of my time/schedule. I'm not sure what to do about this. Any advice?

Thanks for reading,


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Friday, October 8, 2010

Feeling Good :)

Hey Bloggers, So I am having a great day! First of all it's friday, and that's when my weekend starts since I dont have any classes or work on fridays. I weighed, and I was down another .2 of a pound since wednesday. So for the week, I have lost .4 of a pound. I know it's not much, but to me everything counts. I think i'm going to put a ticker to track my weight loss on my blog so I can see the progress.

I also, finally got a call from Radiant 3 productions and I will be going to set with them next friday to start working on an independent film. I have no idea what I will be doing, i'm sure nothing too important since I still don't have much expeirience, but i'm still very excited!

I also got a text from the director for the film i'm acting in and I think we are going to start back up filming soon. So things seem to be looking up for me. I hope things are going well with you all!

Thanks for reading,


Thursday, October 7, 2010

The Aftermath

Hey bloggers! So I just took my test that I was stressing about..and I actually think I did well. The test is all essay/short answer so you REALLY have to know what you are talking about. You can't just identify, you have to actually know it. Despite that, I think my 2 hour study session before the test worked out, there was only one question that I wasn't positive about, but after I talked with some of my classmates afterwards, I think I may have guessed right. So i'm feeling good about it.

I weighed myself on Wednesday and I lost .2 of a pound since Monday. It's not that much, but i'm happy with that. I have been going to these workout classes that are on Monday and Wednesday and I think they have really helped to boost my weight loss. I've also been eating a much more balanced diet, so that's helping too.

I have not heard from Wonderroot TV or Radiant 3 Productions and I am feeling a little nervous.  I'm not sure if I should look for more opportunities for my production resume, or wait to see if they contact me. Also, the independent film that I am acting in has been taking a long time to finish production. I haven't been looking for more auditions since I have been working on this film, since I don't want to overwhelm myself with things to do. I can only work on one project at a time as far as my acting if that makes since. Aspiring actors/actresses? How do you deal with this?

Thanks for reading,


A little stressed...

Hey bloggers! So as we speak... I SHOULD be studying for my midterm. =/ In my defense, I didn't have my first class today so I studied from like 10:00am to like 11:30...the test is at 1. There is just SO much information for this particular test i'm just sick of looking at the information. The test is in my "intro to telecommunications" class and we are going over the technology chapter. There is so much information that it's crazy! I think i'm going to do okay but I am sort of nervous. I think I will take some time now to study before the test. I will try to come back and update later!

Thanks for reading,


Tuesday, October 5, 2010


Hey bloggers, how are you today? I am SORE!! Yesterday I tried something new, and went to workout with this girl from my Acting I class. I have been trying to loose weight and drop about 30 pounds for various reasons, and so I workout at least 4 times a week. The hardest part for me has been eating right, but I think I have made progress in that which I will get to later. But anyway, I always go to workout after my Acting I class, and another girl that is also very talented by the way, ran into me on the way there and asked me to come to this total body workout class with her instead of doing my normal workout.

I was totally willing! And the workout was intense but it was alot of fun, the music was all pop and great to exercise to. But now I am really feeling the pain. Despite that, I did an hour of cardio and now I am REALLY feeling it. I'm not complaining though, I feel this is what I have to do if I want to get this weight off.

Last week, I met with a nutritionist to talk about some different things to get this weight off. She said that I was already off to a great start because I am generally a healthy eater, but she did give me a few pointers to help out. Now I am very determined to get my body in the best shape possible! I hope you all are doing well, I am still trying to get my internships together. I'll update on that soon!

Thanks for reading,



Sunday, October 3, 2010

Working :)

Hey everyone! I am currently at work and am beginning to feel tired =/. I stayed up really late last night playing the Playstation move, it's really fun! I currently have a job where I work in production for a live show that presents jewelry. It's like QVC but we show high end items. I work cameras and type the information up on the screen. It's pretty cool, but of course it's not what I want to do with my life.

The good thing about this job is that I come into contact with people that know a lot about the business and can help me out. I actually have been helping one guy out with his show called "Movie Talk" I told him that when he gets the episodes ready I will start to post them on my blog so you can see them!

On a side note, I really need to loose a few pounds. I lost weight awhile ago, the smallest I got to was 130 pounds (i'm 5'5). I looked really great, now...i'm 167 and I really need to get it together. I know they say that you don't "have" to be thin in order to be an actress/singer, but I know the reality of the situation is that if your body is right, it doesn't hurt. I need to start eating right so I can get that together. Yet another goal I have set for myself! :) Hope all is well for you all out there!

Thanks for reading,